Snake Oil
Dimming our light and becoming a good turtle dad
I was focusing on purposeful nothingness and was flipping through some channels on television recently on a Mother’s day afternoon. My six siblings were texting back and forth in a group chat about different things like they typically do on most holidays. While for years I almost always joined in, I have gotten into the habit of putting far less time and energy into these conversations. I dutifully mentioned a brief Happy Mother’s Day message to the sisters who are Mom’s but maintained some detachment about joining in the lengthy conversations that day. Instead I actually got caught up in watching some episodes of the show Everybody Loves Raymond. I had already seen every episode years ago, but decided on another visit. Both my Mother and Father loved the show while they were alive. It was based on a Long Island family with a few similarities to our own. When the show originally ran, my parents really got excited when “Raymond was on.” After about the third episode my practical mind thought “What are you doing wasting most of an afternoon on this?” My spiritual and emotional parts felt something very different. After a few episodes the vibe of my living room shifted and I could feel my parents in the room with me. It felt like they had joined me in spirit, or even nudged me a bit to watch the show. I had the sensation that they were happily sitting with the son they loved, and part of that connection was watching a show we all really enjoyed. We did similar things like this when I was a child. We often watched television in the evenings as part of our family bonding time and had favorite shows. It was a magical feeling to feel them in the room with me after so many years and I felt blessed to experience a wonderful way to spend some time on Mother’s day. It was like a bridge was created and they briefly joined me in the physical world.
We will put a pin in this and come back to it in a bit.
Like so many old souls, I was a bit of a weird child. I experienced many similar events like this, saw ghosts, communicated wordlessly with animals, remembered some past lifetimes, and had all kinds of spiritual experiences that to me seemed normal. I didn’t have to work at it, all of this came naturally to me. I also fine tuned some skills when I was a child. I quickly developed a wicked sense of humor, partly as a defense mechanism for attacks I received from some of my siblings and the bullies of the neighborhood and in school. While challenging, this focus was definitely part of my road to being a writer and public speaker; I needed to develop a sharp mind and wit. While many people loved my sense of humor, some found it irritating. Another developed skill was that I could also be very charismatic. I learned early on how to get a bit more love and attention from my mother (no easy task). This spread into work and other areas of life where I used this like-ability and charisma to be more successful with working with others. Both of these skills became increasingly polished as I got older. The problem for me was many of my siblings either ignored both of these notable skills or often seemed to resent me for them. I was often told things like “Stop being such a wise ass.” “How come Jimmy gets everything and manipulates Mom?” And the most common one of all; “What is wrong with you?” Like any child in a family I needed acceptance, love, and support, and to be appreciated even a little bit, but that experience was truly a rarity. It unquestionably damaged my self esteem.
Throughout my lifetime every time one of my siblings got married, engaged, had a child, got a promotion, celebrated anniversaries, their kids graduated, my brother celebrated years of being sober, etc.. I joined in and sent gifts or simply verbally patted them on the back for a “job well done.” I did my best to be a good supportive brother and to show that I was proud of them, because I was. Over the years, the problem for me was my accomplishments were rarely, if ever acknowledged or celebrated. While two of my sisters have actually been very supportive, my four other siblings handled the thoughtful support and healthy acknowledgment from my two cool sisters by saying things like “God it’s sickening how much you love Jimmy.” “Stop making his head even bigger.” My two brothers were both especially horrible to me. My other two sisters on occasion were thoughtful but for the most part were minimally supportive, and frequently got annoyed (stopped talking to me) at me for various reasons, usually something I said or “shouldn’t have said.” I often wasn’t even sure what exactly triggered their disdain.
When I published my first two books, my two supportive sisters were proud of me but the other four; nothing. When I bravely did my own public access show in the late nineties while in my twenties (the show was quite popular), nothing. When I began writing a successful column, I got nothing. They never acknowledged it, showed an interest in reading any of it or ever even asked about it. When I started a successful podcast radio show, nothing. From 2017-2021 I appeared 63 times on a popular, nationally syndicated televisions show on ABC. No one ever asked how they could see an episode, or even about what it was like to do something that amazing. My lifetime focus on exercise and fitness, being in really good shape, and still aging quite well now in my early sixties has never been acknowledged. At first I attributed this to many of them not understanding the work I do, and my priorities. Still, something always nagged inside about how strange it was that they wouldn’t show interest or be notably proud of a successful writer, television, and radio personality even if they didn’t understand the subject matter. It was odd, hurtful and felt like old childhood patterns continued to play out even though we were long into adulthood.
Over the years I found ways to deal with the emotional disappointments. My Higher Self nudged me. When I would brew too long on the uncomfortable neglect along came kidney stones, and a round of diverticulitus to “wake me up.” Disease painfully highlighted my need to heal these wounds and forgive. By healing those physical things (almost exclusively holistically, not surprisingly another thing I got no recognition of) I changed perspectives on how I viewed a lot of it. I recognized that because they were different soul ages and had different focuses and interests, spirituality was not something they prioritized. I realized they were in no way “bad people.” Not only did I choose this family (at a soul level) for the opportunity to grow through these wounds, but they all had some notable good aspects that I did appreciate. In sharp contrast I have had friends and clients with really horrible, even abusive families. The biggest realization was that my wanting them to act a “Certain Way” was my side of the problem. It was an uncomfortable mirror of what they often did to me!
Their discomfort and even annoyance for expressing my humorous side was also something I had to gain a new perspective about over the years. Humor has always been a big part of who I am; the philosophical, and often wise-ass storyteller. Being funny has been a highlight for so many of my friends over the years. My close friends laugh hysterically when I say funny, sarcastic things playfully about myself, or them from time to time. Many of my close friends even share my comments, texts, and messages with their friends and family members, who wish “they were in the club.” But from my family I mostly got things like “You shouldn’t say things like that. You’re not funny.” And more often than not they just ignored any commentary no matter how funny or even brilliant when I shared on group texts. It often feels like I am navigating in a completely different world (a truly supportive one) with my friends, co-workers, and many clients who love my sense of humor versus a family who is definitely not fond of it.
I am guessing for many of my readers similar themes may have played out within their own families. After a while you just start dimming your light to not cause a backlash. Minimizing expressing so many parts of yourself becomes a survival mechanism. The problem with this strategy is that you are not being who you were meant to be! This can inevitably becomes very uncomfortable. Over the years, rather than just get mad, angry or choose to theatrically cut some of my siblings from my life like many people inevitably do with family, I just adjusted my involvement with them. I simply communicate far less often. Dimming my light repeatedly just feels wrong. Doing this inevitably began to feel more and more like an imbalance in giving and receiving and an expression of a lack of self love. So, over the years, I adjusted the way, and amount of energy used to interact with some of them. I inevitably found a more balanced, healthier way that keeps my sense of personal integrity intact. Presently and in the future I will still occasionally attend family reunions, and chat with some of them on the phone, or through text from time to time, but this is something I just do far, far less. I can sometimes discuss gas prices, and vacations, trips, concerts, etc...the things they mostly focus on. Fortunately the approximately two thirds of me, my humorous and spiritual side still gets expression, just not with them. I share these aspects of myself with friends, clients, gym buddies, social media followers, people who read my books and columns, and a few close friends that became my chosen siblings, even if we weren’t born into the same families. I have so many people I don’t have to dim my light for and for this I am truly grateful.
Now: Back to my explanation of the experience with feeling my mom and dad magically joining me on Mothers day in spirit. When this happened I got the “bright idea” to maybe share this with my siblings. Old patterns sometimes die hard. They were still chatting away on some text thread that I had ignored for a few hours. When I tuned back into the chat they were comforting my oldest brother Richard. He has always had an angry chip on his shoulder about feeling criticized by his siblings, a big one being he never having married or had children. None of us judge him for this in any way. It is his own self created prison that he failed somehow. His coping mechanism was often getting into a weird competitiveness about proving how amazing he is, or better than everyone to get attention. My siblings were sharing a detailed discussion about how Richard was a really “great turtle dad.” He brought up the silly point to somehow compete as usual amidst the compliments to all the good mothers in the family. They took turns reminding him that “being a good turtle dad” was important and in this way he should celebrate his own version of Mother and Fathers day.
Was this conversation for real? I began to laugh hysterically. I nearly lost it. It was just so funny. I realized I had spent decades of my life wasting energy worrying about getting approval for some of the notable things I had accomplished from people who were now discussing the benefits of being a good turtle dad? I definitely have nothing against the importance of being a good turtle dad and I love all animals, but the silliness of this conversation was priceless. My laughter was just what I needed to complete my healing. It was an added reminder for myself, and why I use the benefits of humor to help shift perspectives with my clients and friends. Sometimes things are just so ludicrous that the laughter itself is what wipes away so much of the pain. And maybe this insight was a message from my Mom and Dad to see the situation differently. Of course I didn’t share my profound spiritual experience and message with my siblings about our parents joining me for a bit that late afternoon. They were busy talking about nonsense, and there is nothing wrong with that! In a weird way the silliness of their discussion almost made them more endearing to me. Still, I will stay on my more discerning course and wisely prioritize sharing my more profound insights and at times brilliant, weird sense of humor with those who can appreciate it.
Jim Ventura 6-2025
Notes
Summer 2025 is here. My Phoenix life for over 30 years now has trained me well at how to handle the uncomfortable hot temps. I typically head to the gym in the mornings, along with running any errands, and then I am pretty much in my home (working on writing and marketing, and doing personal sessions, often by phone) until after sunset. Thankfully my car has some covering during the day, but I still feel bad for it. I try to minimize how much I use it during the peak of the heat. Back in my early years here in Phoenix the bonus was a lot of people left the valley during the peak summer months (Snow-birds) but now it is almost as busy as the winter months. I miss the old quieter, less crowded summers in Phoenix.
I have temporarily shut down my website (JimVentua.com) but will build a new one this fall. The cost kept skyrocketing and it really wasn’t getting used enough to make it worth the high costs. Fortunately I have my BuyMeaCoffee site. A listing of all the session options can be found on the site, and of course you can just email me to request a session. I will send both the availability calendar and a list of the many types of sessions I offer. The Coffee site has grown quite a bit. It now even includes an audio tarot series explaining the meaning of all the cards including the reversed meanings. I am getting major positive feedback on this. Forty years of study and my ability to explain things clearly are making this a popular destination for Tarot readers and those learning the craft. I purposely keep about 60 percent of the options on the site accessible at no cost. But for the purchase of a ‘few coffee’s” this opens up a lot of extra insight with Feng Shui tips. meditations, manifesting, healing techniques, stories from my books, old columns, etc... The even more advanced option is purchasing a yearly subscription. This adds even more insight (only $60 a year) and gives subscribers the option of having sessions with me in-office or by phone anytime for quarterly regular client rates! There are many added benefits including allowing you to purchase up to four gift sessions for friends and family at the notably discounted rates, I am also building a shop on the site. Right now there are a number of session offerings at a good sized discount for anyone to purchase for themselves or to give as a gift. I will soon be adding metaphysical products to the shop as well!
It seems I am also getting more booking than ever with hotel and party events for mini readings. You can actually book a home party if you are in my area or do a virtual party by phone, face-time, or even zoom! I am adding this info later in this newsletter. You can also email me for information about how you can do this and the price. It can be a wonderful addition to any party or event you are having.
If it has been awhile since your last session check-in remember subscribers to Snake Oil get an added $5-10 discount off my listed rates and you can also join my Regular Client Program for discounted regular check-ins. Email is still the best way to book, although text and calls are also an option.
Cheers, Jim V
New Client Special 2025
January 1st 2025 thru November 16th, 2025 Special: New Client introductory offer:
$5-15 off listed rates! A $5 discount off all 45 minute sessions. Both 70, or 90 minute session can take a $10 discount. Debit and credit card payments accepted for all 45, 70, and 90 minute sessions. Local in-office clients can choose an extra $5 off the current rates for cash or check payments for sessions! Pricing is at the end of this newsletter or just request a session and availability calendar. If you want to buy a new client a thoughtful gift of a session you can also take advantage of these rates and use the above discounts!
Channeled corner. I read many, many books from different trance channelers in the 80s, 90s, and early 2000s. Unfortunately many of them are now out of print, but I still have a huge collection and will share some of the best material I have collected over the years.
Nature and Consciousness
“To attempt to protect the self in old terms or to keep the self rigidly ‘itself’ is like holding your breath for too long. Selves, like breaths, go through us all the time. But from our standpoint we are the larger psychological structures that translate these selves into ourselves; just as the body translates our breath into our living.
Even our bodies often seem not us or not ours because we have forgotten how to identify with them, lost the knack of following the strands of consciousness that should connect us, so that our full experience of creature-hood itself is further limited. We seem instead to be victims of the flesh, at the mercy of illnesses, wars, and natural disasters, because we have lost track of our natural selves and lost sight of our place within nature’s framework.
It seems idiotic, for example, to think that we can cure ourselves naturally of illnesses when we believe that disease is thrust upon us by the flesh, and has nothing as all to do with our desires or beliefs. Until we realize that our consciousness, working through the body, creates its state of being, then any natural cures will be considered miraculous. Seth, for example, states that so-called miraculous cures are simply examples of unimpeded nature.
In the same way we are part of nature; physically as real as mountains, air currents, trees, or oceans, all of which have their effects upon the climate and world conditions. Yet for some reason we imagine that we affect the natural world only through our technology. But our physical presence itself has an interaction with the earth and with the physical elements that compose it. We are biologically connected, and this means that the chemical makeup of our bodies is part of the earth’s contents.
Our chemical balance changes as our emotions do, and we alter the composition of the earth. We are not at the mercy of natural disasters. We have forgotten or ignored our native emotional identification with the wind and with storms, and therefore lost our part in their existence, and whatever conscious control we may have once had over them. Therefore we need technology-to bring rain to parched areas, for example-and consider it the sheerest nonsense to blame parched emotions instead...”
Jane Roberts Speaking for herself, not for Seth her book Psychic Politics
“We think a wise person is someone who solves problems. Truth is, a wise person is someone who avoids problems.” Prem Rawat
Regular Client Program
My Regular Clients enjoy working with the many different types of oracles I work with for enlightenment. But a good portion of them work with me in the form of an enlightened counselor and life coach. Discussing what you are going through or working on at each time is definitely healing but also allows added insight from my many years of navigational consultations and the wisdom of working with me, a very old soul!
One of the best programs I have been doing for 26 years now is my Regular Client Program. The program is designed to benefit my clients at multiple levels. Clients who enroll in the program come in every three months for personal sessions (monthly or every-other-month sessions are also an option). This can also be done for out-of-area clients by phone. Session prices are notably discounted for Regular Clients. The focus of the program is on consistent work in developing your intuitive abilities, learning how to navigate more effectively through life by using the signs and signals that are all around us, and conquering fear-based programming permanently. We also get to work with all of the many different oracles I currently work with! My Regular Client Program has resulted in some tremendous spiritual evolution for hundreds of people over the years. Some of my regulars have gone on to do spiritual counseling or similar types of work and some are healing and guiding others personally and professionally. The progress I have seen over the years among the majority of my Regular Clients has been phenomenal. It is wonderful to see the spiritual, physical, and emotional progress I have assisted in motivating. So many of my Regular Clients have dramatically changed the way they now view life and are enjoying a more enlightened point of view. You too can join this program as well, just ask.
More about the Regular Client Program... This program was designed to create an easy, cost-effective way for my clients to progress in their spiritual development. When we are consistent at attending to our body/mind/spirit, we naturally move through life with more harmony and greater joy. When our spiritual awareness is heightened and fine-tuned, we are often happier which helps us to enjoy all aspects of our lives, including occasional personal challenges because we see them as inevitably beneficial. We can truly assist the people around us. Human beings learn by example. Your intimate partnerships, friendships, family, and children benefit when you are in a good space. The Regular Client Program makes it easier to prioritize keeping your spiritual, emotional and even physical “garden” free of weeds. Email me for more information and pricing.
“The enlightened fool is the one who sees the ego trips of society and can still find joy and laughter in its midst. The fool is often the enlightened one, the one with crazy wisdom, with laughter and jokes as their weapons, they cut through the mundane conformity and bring to light the latent child like bliss bubbling just beneath the surface of all seriousness. The fool possesses a wisdom that is out of the reach of the conformist. A playful attitude in touch with enormous amounts of creativity.” George Carlin
“Here is a test to find whether your mission on earth is finished: if you’re alive it isn’t.” Richard Bach
Home and Special Event Parties
My party rate is only $100 per hour. If you are interested in hiring me to do a party or event, let me know and I can check on availability options. There are a number of formats for setting up parties and here is some basic information. Please don’t hesitate to ask if you have any questions about booking parties.
I am available to do private parties (Phoenix and surrounding cities) with “mini readings” for your guests. Parties can be booked with either 10-15 minute or 30 minute session blocks. Many of the different oracles I work with can be chosen for your specific event.
The parties are a fun way to enable family and friends to become more comfortable with the benefits of oracle readings. I have done many of these parties in the past and they are truly memorable events for all of the guests.
Minimum and maximum numbers of readings/hours are required to book a party at your home or office location. The minimum is a 3 hour booking. I offer the option of a 2 and a half hour minimum for locations within 15 miles of my home. Minimum of $250 fee for any booked party. A $50.00 non-refundable deposit is required to hold a party date. These sessions can be great options to consider when there are many people looking for a reading at your event. Shorter 5-10 minute sessions are also an option for really large events.
You can either book me for the $100 an hour rate for your party or event so your guests don’t have to cover any costs, or guests can cover their own costs for readings. Both options work very well, although I still prefer that the host collects all of the payments from guests for their readings with second option to help things move along more efficiently. If your guests are paying for their sessions they are still able to take advantage of the discount that comes with parties at bulk rates.
30 minute readings are a very popular option.
Parties can now be virtual!
If you live out-of-area or even if you simply prefer-mini reading parties they can be by phone or Face-time, Zoom etc...
The format is the same but virtual parties only have a 90 minute minimum booking and can be as long as three hours. Contact me for more information to set up either an in-person event or virtual one at Venturasag@yahoo.com.
Here’s my contact information to make an appointment for a session, or information on current classes: Email: Venturasag@yahoo.com (BEST method for contact).
text only: (602) 349-0746 Phone calls: (602) 957-3035
“Happiness is a risk. If you’re not a little scared, then you’re not doing it right.” Sarah Addison Allen
Information about the different sessions and types of readings, classes and services, past Snake Oil columns, can be found at BuyMeaCoffee.com/VenturaWora (both on the site info and gift sessions available in the shop section)
“Friend” me on Facebook to get other extra offers and in between column extras! Signing up for my fan page will get you even more extras and first shot at reading specials. Simply click on “like” on the fan page and you will automatically get my weekly updates.
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Jim-Ventura/110567902293371?ref=hl
I also have a few other media channels other than Face-Book:
Subscribe to my YouTube Channel (approximately once a month 6-12 minute videos) at J Ventura Snake Oil.
Instagram at Venturawords ( Astrology updates and other insight on short 90 second reels)
Tik Tok (animalspeaks) where I do short but powerful 2-8 minute videos about how to use animal totems and spirit animals, and a number of other metaphysical topics.
All personal sessions/readings for 2025 are: Full session (70 minutes) $125.00; Shorter session (45 minutes) $90.00; Extended session (90 minutes) $150.00, Mini phone session 15-20 minutes $40. Email me for information about my Regular Client Program for even bigger discounts on session prices with the added benefit of monthly or quarterly check-ins. Purchasing 3 prepaid sessions also brings sizable discounts. Some examples; 3 prepaid 45 minute monthly sessions is $155 total or about $52 a session. 3 prepaid quarterly 70 minute session are $245 or about $82 a session.
